Dating "Outside" the Church

Dear Bro Jo,

I am a convert to the Church, and have been a member for about 18 months, so as you might of guessed I have a few questions about the LDS dating scene.

First I am a freshman in college in Washington DC (I’m 19), and am the only member of the church in the ENTIRE undergraduate population, so as might of guessed I am not too interested in the girls at my school.

Also, there is no University ward in the DC area, so a lot of the singles are in their mid to late 20s. The only girls who I could realistically date are the interns from the Y or the U, but the problem is that they are there for only a semester, and then there gone. Not too much time to set up a relationship.

Finally, since I am a convert, there is a good chance that if I serve a mission (which I hear is a big deal to LDS girls) I could very well be disowned by my parents, and I am NOT allowing that to happen.

So I guess my question is: What should I do? Should I try to court some of the girls at my university who have LDS values and hope they convert, or should I go for the interns? If you have any other advice I am more then willing to listen. Thank you and God bless.

Sincerely,

Convert



Dear Convert,

I have good news! There IS an LDS Young Single Adult Ward near you. I’ll email you all of the information.

(Readers: Anyone can find the nearest Ward, YSA Ward and Meeting Times by going to http://www.lds.org and clicking on “About the Church” and then “Find a Meetinghouse”)

If you have the means and Testimony, you should strongly consider applying to serve a Mission. It’s a Once-in-a-Lifetime opportunity. While it’s true that many LDS Sisters see Great Value in Marrying a man that has served an honorable Church Mission, it will have value to you over and above that. Serve for you. Serve the Lord.

If you parents choose to disown you, that’s their decision, not yours. Counsel with your Bishop about whether or not a Mission is Right for You.

I think you should date the LDS Interns. You can know within a month if a girl is right for you or not. And you have the added benefit of getting a new crop of interns in on a regular basis; how great is that?!?

At this point in life, I’d say that if you happen to meet a great non-member girl, and if her interest in the Church is sincere, introduce her to some Missionaries and ask her out AFTER Baptism. Not a good idea to mix feelings of Romance with the Process of Conversion.

But I do have to tell you, my friend, I have a sneaky suspicion that there’s something you’re not telling us. I think you’ve ALREADY got your eye on a non-member girl, that you’re looking for my permission to date her (if you’re not already dating) and you’re wondering how to reconcile your feelings for her with your (albeit shaky) Testimony of the Gospel.

Just a hunch.

I could be wrong.

But I’ll bet I’m not.

If I’m right, let me remind you that if you Really Love Her, you’ll hold off on any Serious Physical Stuff until AFTER you’re married.

Keep that in mind.

- Bro Jo