Yo Bro Jo!
I started reading your column a bit ago and overall you seem to have the right idea. Anyway, I'm 16 and I know this person of the male persuasion who I am good friends with. We'll call him Bob. Bob's in my seminary class, and we were assigned to be scripture buddies (we're supposed to call each other every night to remind each other to read our scriptures, although more and more often we forget about the reminding part and just chat. But we still read our scriptures, don't worry ).
He is a good LDS boy, and a great example for this particular kind-of-struggling LDS girl. He's also kind of oblivious to hints. OK, really oblivious. How does one subtly convince a boy such as this to take one to the prom (or any date, really, but prom's the one I'm worried about right now)? By the way, I am not a blunt person. I am not sure I want to say "When are you going to ask me to prom?" or similar. Your dating advice usually makes sense, so... advice? Am I maybe just a coward? Should I ask him myself? Tell me true, ok?
Sincerely,
Free-range, Cruelty-Free Chicken
Dear Free-range Chick,
(My compliments on one of the best pseudonyms I've gotten so far!)
(And the Seminary Teacher in me loves that you're reading the scriptures.)
No, unless it's a girl-ask-guy dance (we call ours here "TWIRP" - The Woman Is Required to Pay) you shouldn't ask him out (in fact, even in those situations it's better to ask a guy you've already gone on a date with).
Yes, you're a chicken, and so is he (neither of you are alone, by the way).
Three things are possible: a) he really is clueless, b) he's very shy, or c) he's a nice guy but has no intention of asking you.
The only way for you know know which is to come right out and ask him. I don't recommend going to a formal dance with someone you haven't dated before if at all possible (it's a lot of money to blow for both the guy AND the girl on what should be a fun and special evening to spend it with someone it turns out you can't stand) and fortunately you still have time to get a Casual Group Date or two in before prom season.
You're going to have to be brave and come right out and ask him if he's going to ask you out. Sorry, but there's no better way. (A girl's got to know!)
You can check out "Bro Jo's HOW a GIRL CAN GET a GUY to ASK HER ON a DATE" for some pretty good ideas, but in your case I might lump it all into one package.
"Hey, I know it's still January, but I'm thinking that if you have any intention on taking me to the Prom this year you should probably take me on a Casual Group Date or two between here and then, so I need to know: have you given any thought to asking me to prom?"
And if he says "yeah", then you respond with "Good, because I'm hoping you ask. For now, when are you going to ask me out on a date?"
I can't guarantee that he'll say "yeah", or that he'll ask you out - there's a lot of guys in this world, especially LDS ones that have no dating skills What - So - Ever. I'm trying to fix that the best I can . . .
(You may want to drop a huge hint by telling him you think he should check out "Bro Jo's HOW to ASK a GIRL to a FORMAL DANCE" and even right the words "hint - hint - hint" after the link.)
I can't train them all, so you sisters are going to have to help do some of that training lest you want to sit at home on Friday nights, unless you're willing to risk missing the prom.
If he still doesn't ask you, then back off and start looking for someone else. Don't be mad at him, that wouldn't be fair. But don't waste too much time on him either.
Learning these important skills will get you prom dates now, and they may help you find a husband later.
- Bro Jo
PS - let me know how it goes, would ya?
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