How Do You Know if You're in Love?

Hey Bro Jo!

Thank you for all the advice.

Okay, so one question: how do you know when you are in love with someone? like what are you supposed to feel to know you are in love? Does crying over them means you really care?
i know it sounds weird and confusing but i need to know.

- (name withheld)


Dear Name Withheld,

Love is putting someone else before yourself (the Savior is the best example of love).

Some people may express that as crying . . . but not all.

Why do you ask?

- Bro Jo



Dear Bro Jo,

Oh, is just that there was this time at a dance and the guy I like asked one of my best friends to dance and I know it's a dance and guys can ask whoever they want but it somehow really hurt and I started crying(very immature i know). He asked before other girls and I didn't really care, it did make me a bit sad but i knew i couldn't do anything about it. I'm asking if this is love because I had never felt so hurt before and the way I feel towards this guy isn't something I've felt for other guys I've liked in the past. Usually I would just think they're cute or nice but there's something about him that I don't even know how to describe.
I don't know if I'm too young to know what love is? I'm only 15, not even in the dating age, I would really appreciate your help.

- (name withheld)


Dear NW,

I don't think 15 is too young to know what love is, per se, but I also don't think that crying because a guy you like asks your friend to dance and not you is a sign of love.

For the record, I do think 15 is too young to make any permanent, life-long decisions, and that it's too young to be in a serious or committed relationship. The scientific, chemical fact is that at your age, with hormones-a-blazin', it's difficult to separate love, attraction, and other feelings. That's not too belittle you, or any other girl for that matter, it's just that it's typically the way it is. (If it makes you feel any better, boys have problems, too, just at a slightly different age.)

You like this boy, and (so long as he's not a Bad Guy) that's great! Maybe he likes you back, and maybe he doesn't. Either way it doesn't matter because you're a righteous daughter of Heavenly Father, who loves you, and as such you have intrinsic value that no one, regardless of whom he dances with, can take away.

- Bro Jo