[Readers - Today's post comes from a Facebook Wall conversation I had with a reader last week. I'm not sure if this is as big an issue as I've heard it is, but either way, some folks are in some serious Spiritual Trouble.
- Bro Jo]
Dear Bro Jo,
Me and my friends were talking about this and I was wondering what you though. I've heard rumors of LDS young adults going off and getting married and then having sex and then having an annulment afterwards. I kind of think thats worse then just having sex, because its making a joke of marriage, even though it isn't a temple marriage. Your thoughts?
EH
Dear EH,
I think A) no self-respecting judge should grant such annulment, B) they're both Spiritually in a LOT of trouble, C) I wouldn't want one of my kids to marry someone who took something so sacred so lightly, and D) it may be the dumbest thing I've ever heard (and yes, I'd heard of it before)
You know, one thing people never seem to consider when they're with someone who's about to take off their underwear with no commitment (and these "fake marriages" are in no way a commitment) made is that there's nothing about you that's special - if they'd drop trou with you, they'd drop trou with anybody . . . and probably have
Seriously.
So . . . what? If they get horny the following weekend are they going to do it all over again? Does it matter if it's not this person, but someone new?
And does anyone really think the Lord is somewhere thinking "well, they got an annulment, so it doesn't really count"?
Please.
Great topic, EH. I'm posting it in the column next week.
- Bro Jo
Dear Bro Jo,
I think the fact they assumed even signing a piece of paper represents a marriage is a joke in itself.
- EH
Dear EH,
Sad . . . but true.
I understand the desire to have sex (I think that instead of saying "having sex" we should say "creating a family") . . . and sometimes I am concerned that some of the singles in the Church (especially the Single Brethren between 25 and 35) aren't . . . "motivated" enough (seriously, I have no idea what's wrong with them) by the things that are supposed to be "only-between-married" couples to actively seek marriage, but no relationship is good based only on the physical.
- Bro Jo
This sounds sort of like an urban legend. If someone wants to have sex before marriage bad enough, I don't see why they would go to all that hassle to do it.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I think saying "creating a family" sounds sort of weird, since it isn't about creating a family most of the time, it's about spousal bonding just as often. Also....it just sounds weird.
So are you saying because two people who get married and aren't quite ready for the temple yet have a fake marriage???
ReplyDeleteMy husband and I are very much in love and have a very real marriage and are working towards getting sealed and fyi in a temple marriage you still sign a marriage certificate!!!
-a little offended
Dear Anon,
ReplyDeleteI invite you to go back and read what's been written.
What we're talking about is entirely different than your situation.
- Bro Jo
PS - If you go through life being that quick to be "offended", you're going to have a very bitter road ahead.