She Thinks Her Cousin Might be a Lesbian

Dear Bro Jo,

Hi Brother Jo,

 I'm a Mormon and I think my cousin which is a girl might be gay.

I thought a long time ago that she might be but as she has gotten older I feel like she really is.

I don't want to come out and ask her if she is but she has worked with gay people after she got out of High School.

She has been with a girl lots and I have met the girl she seems nice but that's when I realized that my cousin was possibly gay.

She now lives with this girl in my grandparents’ former home and just a steps away is where my Aunt and Uncle live.

I don't want to treat my cousin any different than I did but I don't know how to.

I need advice.

- Cousin




Dear Cousin,

Maybe she is, and maybe she isn't.

While you and I (and God) don't agree with that lifestyle choice, it's hers to make.

She hasn't asked us for help or our opinion, so we shouldn't give it.

The only time we need to step in and "be our brother's keeper" is when someone is in danger or in danger of hurting someone else.

This choice - to have sex with someone of the same gender (make no mistake, that's what homosexuality is) - if she has actually made it does have consequences, but not the kind where we need intervene.

Truth is, if you did say or do something without invitation that's more likely to drive a wedge between you two than it is going to encourage her to choose differently.

Lastly, understand that Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ still love her and won't treat her any differently; being Christian means we should do the same.

- Bro Jo