My friend shared your blog with me and it has been quite interesting to read.
It was also my friend's idea to write in for advice, which obviously I am taking.
Let me share my situation with you. I am 16 years old.
My story begins when I met this boy who for privacy sake, I will call Johny.
I met Johny at EFY. I had a mild interest in him when we finished off the week. We stayed in contact and our friendship grew, along with our feelings for each other.
Almost a year passed by and we had gone on a couple of dates. We were hanging out and he held my hand. That was about 8 months ago.
We have continued to hangout, go on dates, he has introduced me to his friends, and I have introduced him to mine. Our families have met, and had dinner together. Even our siblings hangout now.
We have gone to stake dances and have just been growing as friends, all the while holding hands on verily often. Needless to say, I enjoy being around him very much. He has become one of my very closest friends, and has helped me become a better person.
But then I think to myself of the Prophet's council to people of my age. I want the best for Johny and I want to be able to serve a mission, and not have issues before that time comes. We are both trying to do what we think is best for us, but it is hard when our feelings get in the way.
We have not kissed, but I do believe Johny has gotten the idea he wants to. I personally can only see myself being comfortable with a kiss on the cheek. So this is where I would very much appreciate your advice.
Should I let Johny kiss me?
Or should I be okay with Johny kissing me on the cheek?
Thank you very much for your time and your advice,
- Sally (Not my real name)
Dear Sally,
You should never kiss anyone, or let them kiss you, if you're uncomfortable with the idea. Moreover, you should never kiss (or do anything else) with anyone because you feel obligated.
If you want to kiss him, and he wants to kiss you, that can be okay, but keep it simple (no make out sessions). You may want to check out "Bro Jo's GUIDE to KISSING", specifically the section for teens your age.
(You can also search "kissing" on the Dear Bro Jo website, or click HERE.)
The other thing I think you need to do to keep this "relationship" from becoming too serious too soon (and to make sure both of you stay worthy) is to cut out your alone time together. Still date and talk and treat each other nicely, but keep all of your dates Casual Group Dates.
And date other guys, too, and don't get jealous when he takes other girls on Casual Group Dates.
Which means that you'll need to talk to him about all of this. Tell him everything you've told me. Tell him you're not ready to kiss yet (if that's the case), tell him you really like him, and tell him that you're worried that the two of you are getting too serious too young. Tell him you still want to date him, but that it's best for you two to keep things Casual.
The sooner you have the talk, the better you'll feel.
- Bro Jo
Dear Bro Jo,
Thank you so very much for your advice. I appreciate what you do for youth everywhere.
- Sally
Dear Sally,
Thank you for the kind words!
- Bro Jo
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