During my junior year of high school I started dating this boy whom I met through some mutual friends.
At first we always went on group dates together with our other mutual friends. Once we became more comfortable with each other and as we started to develop a stronger connection, we started spending more time together alone.
It didn't take long for me to realize my love for this boy. We always had so much fun together consisting of nonstop laughter and so many memories I'll never forget. I loved his family and they seemed to return that love as well.
However, we ran in to problems here and there because he was never very good at communicating his feelings and always seemed to keep everything inside. I tried to talk to him about things often when there was tension, but he was such an introvert it was hard.
Sometimes I would even confide to his mom about this.
Also, he is not a member of the Church and we would sometimes run in to trouble here as well.
We dated for about a year and 5 months and as are bond became stronger he seemed to want more and more things from me which I could not give. Sometimes it even resulted in me slightly lowering my standards for the moment, but after I had realized this was happening I could not bare to keep it up, and knew it had to stop.
I talked to my parents about things and they helped me through some of it. When I went away for college he and I had decided to end things. He knew of my religious values and goals and we had even talked about it once or twice, but sometimes he still tried to push me.
So when I went away for college I decided to end things because I realized I wanted to be with someone who shared the same religious values as me and I was having a hard time with how reserved he was and how difficult it was for me to get him to communicate his thoughts and feelings with me, or even respond to my text message within the hour.
However, once I left I could not help but continue to think about him and we both seemed to miss each other greatly. We tried giving it another chance after awhile but i again came to the same conclusion that i wanted to find someone who was a member of the Church, who had the same standards as me, and who was better at communicating with me.
Yet, here I am again, still missing him and struggling to learn to live without him. I try to date other guys, but i cant seem to find genuine interest in anyone. I know being with Sergio is not what is best for me since we don't have the same values and goals, but I am having so much trouble moving on and trying to date other people that i am not at a loss about what to do.No one compares to the way he made me feel.
I sometimes feel there is a reason I still feel the way I do. I feel like the love I have for him is so strong and I don't know how to get rid of that.
I would give anything for him, sacrifice anything for him. If you have any tips to help me again feel that excitement about someone else as I did then, with him I'd love to know.
Or any advice on how I approach the situation.
I know he feels the same about me still. He occasionally texts me here and there and I just know in my heart he feels the same.
But really, at this point I'm almost willing to try anything.
- Sincerely Boomerang
Dear Sincerely,
What you need to try is . . . patience.
Keep dating other people who share your standards and could someday marry you for Time and All Eternity in the Temple.
Stick to your standards.
Your relationship with this man, if anything at all, should go no further than to encourage him to seek out the Gospel, to meet with the missionaries, and to become closer unto his Savior.
That's it.
Nothing more.
As time passes it will be easier for you to live with this former romance having ended.
And you will find what you so desperately, and so correctly, seek.
Be Patient.
- Bro Jo
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