Will Her Confession Get Him Sent Home?

Dear Bro Jo,

I have been seeing this guy for a year and things have been great. But the closer it got to him to leave on his mission we began to spend more time to gather alone .

During this time we did make out a lot and he would lift of his shirt and garment top so he could feel his skin next to mine both shirts stayed on but they were lifted enough so we could touch each other back and stomach.

He has left on his mission we never told the Bishop what we had done because he said it was okay that we didn't do anything wrong, but now that I'm planning to go on a mission myself I would like to repent properly and tell my Bishop.

Will it get my elder in trouble since he hasn't repented and  he still feels he did nothing wrong?

I don't want to miss out on me serving a mission with a pure heart.

- Name Withheld




Dear NW,

When it comes to concerns about worthiness it's always better to talk to your Bishop than to not.

While I'm sure the guy you were seeing (you do understand, I hope, that you're not currently seeing each other?  and that it's a little inappropriate for you to call him "my elder", I hope . . .) is a great guy and all, generally speaking when you've done something that you feel uncomfortable about and the man you did it with is trying to convince you that it's okay and you did nothing wrong you're better off listening to the Spirit than the man.

- Bro Jo




Dear Bro Jo,

When I go and tell my Bishop will they force him to come home from his mission since he did not repent because he was leaving soon?

He's already been out 6 months .

- Name Withheld




Dear NW,

You and I have no real way of knowing what he's said or not said to his Bishop, Stake President, and Mission President.

Nor is it our place to determine what qualifies as a reason to be sent home.

If he is to be sent home (which I doubt, by the way) that reality should never keep you from doing the right thing.

Being sent home, like any Church discipline, isn't a "punishment", it's a step taken to help that person mend things with the Savior; to help them feel the Spirit again.

It's not my place to shield Sister Jo from the need to repent, nor she me.  Further, to do so would hinder the other person's Spiritual Progression.  You never keep someone you love from mending things with God.

You focus on your own situation and love them and help and support them.

But never get in the way.

- Bro Jo