Boy Talk

Dear Bro Jo,

I have started reading your column quite recently, so this question might have been answered, but here goes: How do we girls know that a guy is talking to us just to be nice vs. talking to us because he really wants to 'go somewhere' with a relationship? Any help would be fabulous! Thank you.

Sincerely,

Curious Sister from UT


Dear Curious,

Hmmm . . . that's a pretty broad question and the answer will vary depending on a lot of variables.

Most guys don't spend what I call "lots of one-on-one" time with girls they don't find attractive, but that doesn't mean that they every intend to do anything about how they feel.

Consider the setting, the publicness of the conversation, the frequency, and the topics discussed.

A guy who plops down next to you on the sofa at Church and asks how school's going is just being polite. If the same guy sits close and looks into your eyes like a lonely puppy, he likes you.

If he says "hi" as you pass in the hall at school, he's polite; if he stops and wants to chat he likes you.

If it's just you and he only once in a while and typically around a bunch of people, he's being polite; if it's you and he all the time with no one else really around, he likes you.

See the difference?

- Bro Jo