Dear Bro Jo,
I am a college freshman, ready and able to fall in love and become the help-meet of a truly wonderful young man.
I think I've found one. He makes me happy and I love spending time around him. He took time out of his busy schedule to stop in the hallway and call my name until I saw him, then exchange a few words with me. There was a happy glow surrounding the rest of my day because I saw him and heard his voice.
Bro Jo, I think I'm falling in love. I haven't known him for very long, and we don't see each other as often as I would like, but I don't want to give up on the feeling like I would have in high school, because it was "just a crush." He is an RM, worthy and in control of his life. I've read your blog and your book on YSA relationships, but I want some personal advice on what I can do. I'm excited about learning to love him more than I love myself. I'm thrilled to learn all about him and find ways to serve him. I don't want to lose my head, and do things that aren't wise or good for both of us. I do want to show him that I am the kind of girl that he wants to know more about ;) I'm shaking in my shoes because I'm now at the age where serious relationships are encouraged.
Please give me some of your words of wisdom as I embark into the scary world of "grown-up relationships". And do you think that my feelings could be the sign of something more mature than a high school crush?
Thank you so much,
~Taking it Slow
Dear Taking it Slow,
As grandma said, when you know, you'll know.
For now you're on the right track.
You'll need to put some things in motion, but you're right not to rush just yet.
A great way to let him know you're interested and that he should make seeing you more of a priority is . . . well, food.
There was this girl I liked once. She and I worked at the same place. We flirted from time to time, but nothing ever came of it. I thought she wasn't really interested (I didn't realize at the time she was just shy.)
One day she brought me brownies that she had made. I figured that was a clear "go ahead and ask me out" signal, and was planning to do just that.
A couple days later I was going to call her and I got a care package in the mail from a girl I was REALLY interested in but thought I didn't have a chance. The care package had the best brownies I'd ever tasted.
I asked that girl out instead.
We now call her Sister Jo.
The point isn't so much the food, but the sign that there is interest and concern.
Call it old fashioned, but there's still some truth to "the way to a man's heart is through his stomach".
- Bro Jo
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