Dear Bro Jo;
I've thought a lot about emailing you in the past...but I never have. Maybe it's because I figured it out on my own. Or because I didn't want to bother you. Either way, I always talked myself out of it.
But now however.... well I want the opinion of an impartial party. If you don't mind.
The story will be long, and if you make it to end, well you're awesome. You're awesome regardless. But I appreciate this so much. Thank you.
So, I am an ERM (early return missionary). I was honorably released for medical reasons after 6 days in the MTC. I got home August 6th. Since coming home I've found out who my friends are. Who I can count on and who I know will be there for me. It's been a long process, but I'm finally starting to be okay. And no, I will not be going back out. My answer from HF was to stay home. My answer was very specific..... that I need to stay home....so I could meet my husband. Meet, not marry. I still have a hard time accepting that, because I don't want to be that girl. But I digress.
Since coming home my best friend from before I left, well he and I got a lot closer. We went on a few dates. And I really like him. He got his patriarchal blessing a month or two ago, and ever since he's been having dreams of him and I getting sealed in the temple. And I went to the temple 2 weeks ago to do a session...and I had the same... inspiration I guess we'll call it. We finally talked about it a couple days ago...and we decided we wanna get married.
He leaves dec 2nd for boot camp. He's going to be a marine. Now I can wait through boot camp. 3 Months is going to be fine.
But, tonight I got into a major fight with my dad. He and I fight a lot. And by a lot I mean every other day. At least. And since coming home, I've been living with my parents to have some stability. Well this fight was a big one. I won't get into the details. But I was talking to my two incredibly good friends about it. Just venting about my dad. And one of them, we'll call her Jane, she is going to road trip to Provo to live with our friend... Jana (name changed). And Jane wants me to go with her. She wants to pick me up on the way, and we can go to Provo to live with Jana.
Jane thinks it's a great idea because it gets me away from my dad, and the people in my area who are still spreading rumors about why I came home. Jana thinks it's an incredible idea as well.
But this boy and I.... if I leave it'll probably be harder to maintain our relationship. And we probably won't get engaged or married.
I've prayed and thought about this a lot. But I just... I want another opinion.
Maybe I'm silly for asking.
But thanks for reading.
- Confused
Dear Confused,
If he's leaving in ten days for three months of Boot Camp ... I don't understand how your relationship would be in jeopardy...
He's certainly not going to be dating anyone while he's training, and when he gets leave he could just as easily visit you in one place as another.
But let me suggest this: if you two are really talking about marriage, then I think the person whose opinion you should be asking is his.
- Bro Jo
Dear Bro Jo,
I have. And the only thing he'll say is "Do whatever makes you happy, I love you and just want you happy." Which is nice, but also not a legitimate answer.
- Confused
Dear Confused,
Yes it is. It's the best answer.
You know, sometimes when we want someone to tell us what to do, the reality is that we know what to do and we just don't want to face it.
I think you're lucky that he's so supportive.
- Bro Jo
Dear Bro Jo,
I get what you're saying...but I don't know what to do.
- Confused
Dear Confused,
I don't understand why. It seems pretty clear in what you've written to me.
But, as I say often, if you don't know what to do, that's often the Spirit telling you to do nothing.
Yet.
- Bro Jo
Dear Bro Jo,
I'm glad it's clear to one of us. haha.
True.
I'll think and pray some more.
Thanks,
- Confused
Dear Confused,
Anytime.
Let me know what you come up with.
- Bro Jo
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