Love at First Sight?

Dear Bro Jo,

I'm feeling crushed.

A guy will pay attention to me, flirt with me, maybe ask me for my number, and I'll fall head over heels for him.

I'll be holding on to every thread of hope I can find to prove that he really does like me until I come to the harsh realization that, although he may have thought I was cute or interesting at some point, he does not have the same feelings that I have for him.

But before that realization I'll go through a roller coaster of being on Cloud 9 when he talks to me or is nice to me and being totally crushed when he ignores me or flirts with another girl.

That just happened AGAIN and I'm SO sick of it!!!

I am 20 years old and I have never had a guy feel the same way that I've felt about him.

There's nothing wrong with my appearance, I'm fit and moderately attractive.

I feel that it might be that I get friend-zoned super fast...but why is that?

How do I avoid this miserable cycle that I put myself through and actually get a guy to like me past the first time meeting me?

- Name Withheld




Dear NW,

Don't you think going from "flirting" to "head over heels" and "Cloud 9" so fast is pretty extreme?

I mean, maybe you just need to relax and realize that flirting is just flirting and save the falling in love for someone you've actually been on several dates in a row with . . .

Maybe you're not getting friend zoned; maybe it's just the over-emphasis and drama that you're injecting into these situations that makes it seem that way.

Try reading through the things I've written on How a Girl Can Get a Boy's Attention  and How a Girl Can Get a Guy to Ask Her on a Date.

Put some of it into practice and see if that makes a difference.

Just be careful not to come on too strong.

- Bro Jo