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Wednesday, December 25, 2013

What If Other People in Your Casual Group Are Holding Hands and Kissing on the Date?

Dear Brotha Jo!

I have a question for you.

I love casual dating; it's so much fun!

Something that bothers me, however, is that my friends are not so casual...

There are too many "unofficial relationships" in my circle of friends for my liking, but that is up to them and is their own choice.

We're friends, though, and so when it comes to dating, we often come to one another to plan fun dates.

But there always seems to be an "unofficial official" couple in our group... It makes things awkward.

They're holding hands or even occasionally kissing when the rest of us are okay with laughing, having fun, and getting to know each other: the way that things SHOULD be on a Casual Group Date.

I think you are probably going to say something like "find new people to go on dates with," and so if you do, I get it.

- A Girl



Dear Girl,

I agree with you that some of your friends are being too familiar, but I'm not sure I'd draw the line as soon as you are.

If they're making out while you're all at dinner, or if they want to go parking instead of hiking, or if they miss most of the movie because they're staring at each other, then . . . yeah . . . I think you need to increase your circle of friends.

If it's just a little hand holding and quick kisses goodnight at the door, I'd let it go.

Ultimately, what needs to take precedence is you not making sure you feel uncomfortable.

But remember this, when we cut people off or out of our lives then we can no longer set a good example for them, and we might not be there for them when they need us most . . . when the relationship ends and they need someone to talk to.

- Bro Jo



Dear Bro Jo,

I totally agree about being able to set a good example for them.

Thank you for the reminder, and for the encouragement!

I appreciate it.

Sincerely,

- Girl



Dear Girl,

Anytime!

- Bro Jo

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