Sunday, February 21, 2010

Follow Up - Moving On

[Readers:  The following letter is a follow up from the writer of "Moving On".  Read the original letter and column HERE.  - Bro Jo]


Dear Bro Jo,

Thank you so much for your wonderful advice.

In the meantime of you writing me back.... He came home for Christmas break and I took him to a dance. I know you probably wouldn't agree to taking college guys to high school dances and that this doesn't adhere to your "let him pursue you" advice but I didn't realize it at the time and I had asked him a long time ago and I was still unstable haha. We had an amazing time together. My guy friend told me that when the guys in our group were with each other he told them all... "A tip for all you guys, don't take your ex-girlfriend on a date, you'll just wind up falling in love with her again." To sum it up we ended up getting back together (keep reading :) ) and these past two weeks have been two of the happiest I’ve had in a long time. He was so sweet to me as always. I felt so taken care of. And I got to spend part of Christmas with his family and cute little siblings whom I'd missed. I just felt whole again.

Well through my happiness I knew it wasn't right. I prayed and fasted what was the right thing to do but I didn't seem to be getting an answer. Now I know that I was just blocking out the answer that I didn't want - that now isn't the right time for a serious relationship. Too late for that haha. So two days ago he came to my door in tears. He told me that although he's been so happy it just didn't feel right and that he'd been praying but that he wanted it so much he didn't want the right answer (sounds like me). So we broke it off and it feels like I'm starting over. All these questions about lines and boundaries. So you're advice helps so much. I know I was bordering on if not falling into annoying last time haha and I want things to be different. I just wanted to be there for him and let him know I still care blah blah blah but I think I can make it work this time. It's not about me. It's about his mission. And i get comfort in the fact that I'm doing the right thing and being obedient.

So there aren't really any questions in there haha just an update i guess. Now I'm just focusing on being happy and trying to look at things in an eternal perspective - taking one day at a time. I have my family who loves me and great friends and I still have his friendship. I got it pretty good :)

Thank you again for your advice and if you'd like to comment again I'd love to hear it!

(name withheld)


Dear NN –

I've got nothing to add! Thank you for you kind words and testimony of the Gospel.

- Bro Jo

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