College Dating Plans

Dear Bro Jo,

Ok so this blog thing is like... the coolest ever!!

I love it and have had so much fun reading it and learning, its great to see other people can feel just as confused as me and that there are simple answers for it all.

SO... I am 18 years old and will be heading off to college next fall.

I dated, as in AWESOME GROUP DATES :), a ton in highschool and loved it and met so many great people.

My junior year I totally fell in love with this guy, hahaha ok actually just had huge crush on him, and he is my best friend. We never had a physical relationship, and never talked about anything romantically until the summer before his mission.

I think we did things maturely and I don't have any regrets because I am not "waiting" for him, but we do write every once in a while.

Now that he has been gone for about a year I have dated alot and met alot of boys that are cute and even liked a few of them, but I still just love him :)

I'm not ready for a serious relationship right now, and I don't even know if I will be when "missionary man" comes home, but as I go to college and start dating alot of RMs and such, what do I tell them?

Do I tell them I am writing a missionary, cause its not like I am his girl friend or whatever, but I do LOVE him?

Do I just say I am not interested?

I do want to go ON dates but I don't want to be DATING someone, is that just not the case in college?

I know that if I continue to do the best I can to follow Heavenly Father I will marry someone that I completely love and they love me and it will all work out but for the next year or so what do I do?

Thank you so much and sorry if those are lame questions :P

Sincerly,

- Growing up?

P.S. since I didn't know what all you needed to know I just gave the basics...not really sure what else I needed to say to get an answer




Dear Growing Up,

The basics are often all I need. You did great!

So my opinion is this:

1. Date lots in college (in fact, go out with any decent guy that asks; go out twice if he's nice, and more if you have a good time with him) 

2. Don't tell anybody you're writing a guy in the field unless they ask, and even then play it casual ("I do write this guy I went to high school with once in a while; yeah, we dated, but it's not like I'm waiting for him" - all of which is true) 

3. Don't worry about or put any effort into NOT getting in a relationship; if it happens you'll be glad, if it doesn't happen no big deal at this point 

4. Realize that it's okay that you "love" the guy that's gone, but that part of those feelings is that he's gone (can't fight with or stress out over anyone that can't date, can't call, and isn't supposed to have any other possible girls in his life), and part of it is that you like "the idea" of him  

I hope that helps.

And thanks for reading "Dear Bro Jo"!

- Bro Jo