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Wednesday, June 11, 2014

What is the Church's Position on Birth Control?


The following is a comment, and my response to it, on a post from September 2, 2009.  You can read the original HERE.

- Bro Jo]

Dear Bro Jo,

So I realize that you might not get this, seeing as the post is close to 5 years old, but I have a question about birth control that I didn't feel got adequately answered in this post.

As has been mentioned, the purpose of sex is to bring children into the world. So, if you do not want/are not ready for/etc. children, and solely want to participate in this sacred act for the enjoyment or whatnot, does the Church say it's okay to use things like birth control and contraceptives?

Or is that like making a mockery of procreation?

I'm just curious about this, as I grew up under the impression that sex was something solely for the use of bringing children into the world, but as I've gotten older, I'm not sure this is the correct impression, and I haven't really seen anything put out by the Church on this topic.


- Anon

Dear Anon,

Well, as I said in the original post, it’s not my place to speak for the Church.

That said, I think I did answer your question in that post.

None-the-less, if you want the Church’s Official Position on any topic, it’s always best to go to the source. 


My personal opinion is that:

1.  No one should have children (or more children) if they're not capable of raising those children well

2.  "Capable" is not necessarily for the rest of us to decide (although I think we're entitled to our opinions, and too many people frankly aren't capable), and has little to do with money or possessions

3.  Putting of children for worldly things is selfish, and while I don't think people should choose to have children for selfish reasons, I think realizing that they're being selfish should be a great motivation for people to change

4.  Two consenting adults can do whatever they want with and to each other so long as no one gets hurt, including others that might have to deal with the consequences of those actions

5.  Sex is best when it's between a man and a woman who are Sealed to each other for Time and All Eternity

6.  More people need to realize that Children are often the result of sex, even if birth control is used

7.  Pregnancy changes the lives of everyone involved, regardless of the result

8.  The instances where terminating a pregnancy is justifiable are very, very rare

9.  "Good Sex" requires selflessness

10.  Married couples should regularly have sex, and not limit it to just "making babies".

- Bro Jo


Anonymous said...

Hi Bro Jo! I love your blog and it's very insightful. :)

That being said, although you answered the question about birth control, I just wondered what you personally feel in a situation that I came across when I met one of my roommates at BYU last year.

As usually happens, us roommates were talking amongst ourselves about silly things like wedding colors and honeymoon destinations we wanted, when one particular roommate started talking about her parents' wedding. We came to find out that she was a product of two virgins having sex for the first time on the night of their wedding (I'm not sure why her parents told her this, nonetheless, they did).

Now, I don't know about you and your wife or anyone else, but if I was a newly married bride who became pregnant the night of her wedding, I'm don't think that I would be ready to take care of a child, and even if I was, I'm not sure I'd want to. I know that's extremely selfish, but I'd rather take at least a few months to enjoy time with my new husband before embarking on that path of life, which I am excited to do eventually, just not my wedding night. From what my roommate said, her parents sort of felt the same way. They had no money, her dad had lost his job, and her mom was very sick throughout the pregnancy, they could barely pay bills, let alone buy food and baby things. Although she was/is a great blessing to their family and is an amazing young woman, it seems her parents just weren't prepared for a child at that time in their lives.

So, I guess what I might be trying to ask is, what do you personally believe (or even practice, if that isn't too personal and without details) as to the whole "night of the wedding" or honeymoon thing? If you don't want "risk" impregnation on your honeymoon and have a baby 9 months later, but also know the failure rate of birth control and of problems it can cause later down the road, but also realize and appreciate the higher purpose of sex is procreation, what do you personally think is acceptable in that situation?

Thank you! I hope that wasn't TMI or asking too many questions.

Bro Jo said...

Dear Anon,

Thank you for your kind words.

And those are great and insightful questions!

I'll answer them as their own post on Monday, July 14th.

- Bro Jo

Anonymous said...

Ok this might be pathetic, but when it comes to relationships what I fear most is the physically stuff especially sex. Probably just the fear of the unknown, how would you suggest someone get over a fear of marriage because of that? From what I know marriage is hard work, but having someone to go through life together and talk to sounds great it's just the sex that's scary.

Bro Jo said...

Dear Anon,

I don't think it's pathetic. In fact I don't think it's that uncommon . . . in the Church, anyway.

We can talk about this more if you like; send me an email.

- Bro Jo