Things to know

Regularly read by 50,000+ readers in over 140 countries around the world, "Dear Bro Jo" is published every Monday, Wednesday and Friday (with occasional additional posts, too).

This is column is just one guy's opinion, and while he does his best to keep what he thinks, says and writes in-line with the Gospel of Jesus Christ, Bro Jo is not a spokesman or authority for the LDS Church. (And Sister Jo thinks you should know that he's sometimes wrong, and often way too opinionated for his own good.)

Nothing here is meant to take the place of talking with parents, leaders, or Church authorities. Please, if you need serious help, talk to a trusted adult, leader, and / or professional counselor.

Please like our Facebook page, and check it often for Discussions, Notes, Events and just General Good Stuff!

Everything here is copyrighted. If you're going to quote any part of anything here, please get Bro Jo's written permission. You can reach him at dearbrojo@gmail.com.

Friday, February 17, 2017

Should He Start Dating?

Dear Bro Jo,

I recently found this blog (looking for LDS dating advice) and I think I can step outside of my comfort zone now.

I am 17 years old and I have always been quiet and reserved, just by nature, so it's hard for me to get out there. I've never been out on a date and don't have many friends outside of my ward because of it. I have been trying harder recently though by going to the dances more frequently but, I feel like girls just aren't eager to get to know me because of my introversion. I don't think it's because of my physical appearance either because I know girls aren't as vain as us guys. (Not bragging, but I have been told I have some positive qualities both physical and spiritual).

I feel like I'm missing something important, like confidence. Should I even try to go for it?

I know you probably get this a lot but, what can a quiet guy like me do to get a nice, decent girl to go on a date with him? Any other tips or advice?

Love the blog BTW.

Sincerely,

The Quiet One





Dear Quiet,

Of course I think you should "go for it".

It's pretty normal and natural to apprehensive about dating.

That's why I recommend that people your age go on Casual Group Dates.

Where you're at in life, I think dating should be a no-pressure, very simple, get to know people better activity.  Kind of like a Priest-Laurel activity . . . without leaders.

Start by getting a good Dating Buddy; someone who shares your standards (even if he's not LDS) and won't push you or your date to be or do anything unbecoming a future missionary.

Lastly, the trick to getting to know people better is to learn to become a good listener.  Don't grill them like you're a detective in a cop show, just ask sincere questions about the things they like and do; listen to what they say, and ask relative follow-up questions when appropriate.

Relax and have fun.

- Bro Jo

No comments: