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Monday, February 20, 2017

The "Hey sup" Text

Dear Bro Jo,


So question for you. I'll keep it short.

Recently I have given my number to a couple of guys who have asked.

The first one has only texted me things like "Hey" or" what's up?", which I have so far ignored. I'm not going to be his texting buddy. And this weekend the second guy asked for my number he was very vague about when he would have time to do something together. Today he texted me "Hey sup"

So I guess my question is should I just continue to ignore the texts?

If they get around to actually get around to asking me out great. If not then oh well?

Also if they ask when I see them around why I haven't answered what should I say?


- M

Dear M,

As much as this old guy is not a fan of it, texting is how people communicate now.  

While I still maintain that personal communication (like date requests and breakups) doesn't belong in a text, an initial "what's up" shouldn't just be ignored.

I think a more appropriate and effective response would be to say "nothing much here; why don't you give me a call".

And, yes, if a guy doesn't actually ask you out, especially if you've told him that he should, then "oh well" - his loss!

Which gets to your last question.  When someone complains of your lack of response to their Very Lame" attempt at communication, see it as a teaching opportunity.  Don't condescend or lecture, simply say "I think I'm worth the effort of a phone call or to be asked out in person; don't you agree?"

Then, if you really want results, touch him on the arm and tell him that you're hoping he'll take the hint and give you a call.

After all, you can't expect people to live up to your expectations and standards if they have no idea what those expectations and standards are.

- Bro Jo

1 comment:

Ben said...

Thank you for this, I appreciate your respect and how you answer questions.