Dear Bro Jo,
Quick question...what's the appropriate response when a missionary I'm writing to asks for a date when he gets home?
I like the idea of having dates lined up around the block, but I don't want to be a distraction to them from what they should be focusing on.
Plus...who knows...what if I'm engaged or married or whatever by the time the Dear Elder in question gets home?
That would make for a pretty awkward date! Lol!
- Cheese
PS: Mama Cheese suggests departing missionaries say something like "I'll bet you dinner that you're married before I get home" to anyone they're interested in. It's a win-win wager. Is there something like that I could try?
Hello, Cheese,
I think it's ridiculous (and dumb) for departing or serving
missionaries to make any dates or date plans (although I think Mama
Cheese's line is great).
I think the appropriate response is "sounds like you're focusing on me
too much and not enough on the work; that's a discussion that we can
have when you come home, IF I'm available AND interested".
As Sister Jo says, "don't make any plans with a guy who's not in a
position to follow through with them, and never make it easy on those
that are chasing you".
Cheers,
- Bro Jo
Dear Bro Jo,
Thanks for the quick reply.
I have a more specific question: what do I do with these (images attached)?
I have received several of these "Future Date Coupons".
Do they have some kind of coupon making class in the MTC or something?
Sister Jo sounds really smart; I don't want to make things too easy on these guys.
Although some I'm more inclined to make it easy for than others. XD
Still, they're serving missions.
That's a tough gig.
They get plenty of rejection in the average day; I don't want to make it any harder than it already is.
- Cheese
Dear Cheese,
Several???
What the heck!?!
Man, there are some weirdos in the Church . . .
You've got one there that is dated almost two years from now???
The dude JUST LEFT!
Telling a guy to focus on his mission is not a rejection . . . it's a reminder.
- Bro Jo
PS: Why did you mark out the names?
PSS: Every day on a mission may not be Singing Trees and Dancing Flowers, but I don't think girls at home need to feel sorry for missionaries. It is, after all, called "the best two years". If it's not, that's a missionary preparation and attitude problem, and one that does not require a "girl at home sympathetic for your whiny rear-end" solution.
Dear Bro Jo,
In this case "several" means three.
So not like I get one every day or anything.
But enough that I was starting to wonder whether it's some kind of secret missionary tradition to see who can redeem the most coupons after they get home or something.
And yeah... this particular guy still has a very long time to go.
I'm not exactly planning on waiting that long to start Serious Single Dating; I'm not sure I'll even be available when his time frame rolls around.
I crossed out his name in case you know him.
You know a lot of people and he might be horribly embarrassed if he knew you knew him.
Not saying you do.
You probably don't.
But it's nicer to preserve a guy's dignity and only make fun of him anonymously in case I ever do want to cash in that coupon, know what I mean?
- Cheese
Dear Cheese,
That's a great question!
I asked the Jo Boys that are on missions (all three of them) and they all think it's Super Weird.
No, it's not an activity in the MTC . . . and they frankly think that they guys that make these kinds of coupons are:
a) weird
b) sad
and
c) pathetic
And they advise you to stay away.
They're also not excited about getting guys like this as companions. (All of them who have had companions with "relationships" back home testified that It Does distract from the work, it's tough to help a "just broken up with" companion to get refocused, that when said companion does refocus, he's a better missionary than before the breakup, and they all feel that making any kind of commitment before heading to the MTC is a bad idea - for Elders AND Sister Missionaries.)
- Bro Jo
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