Bad Boys VS Good Guys

Dear Bro Jo,

I went out on a date today with a very cute young man.

The date was fun but I found out some things about him that worried me.

He did not go on a mission, has not been to Church for a while, and recently tried alcohol.

Other than that we get along really well and have a lot in common.

I really like him other than the fact that he is sort of a Bad Boy.

I am barely 20 and still young to get married . . .  but I want to get married in the temple.

In his current state he could not take me there.

I am confused whether or not I should be in a relationship with him.

It’s not like I’m going to marry him... I know there’s the saying "you marry who you date".

But that isn’t for every guy right?

I want to date him, but his actions suggest otherwise.

And what if I date him and then miss out on that special someone??

- Conflicted




Dear Conflicted,

This guy is not worth your time.

Not right now, anyway.

First of all, you're wrong: 20 is not too young for a young woman to get married, especially in the Temple.

Maybe you're not ready yet . . . and I submit that's because you're not in the right kind of relationship with the right kind of guy . . . but no, 20 in and of itself is not too young for a young woman to marry.
I see no point in you going out with this guy again.

At all.

Toads DO NOT turn in to Princes just because you kiss them.

If he gets his act together. Goes to Church. Changes his attitude. Becomes Temple Worthy.

Then, IF you're still single, I'd say okay.

But until then he's just a wanna-be rebel hoping he can impress you with his poor choices enough that he can get you to do stuff you ought not do.

And, YES, little sister, it is absolutely true that you marry who you date.

You keep seeing this guy, and the Good Guys will back off.

Be Nice to the guy.

But don't be his best friend or treat him like a project.

As for dating him . . . move on.

Instead of Bad Boys give your time and attention to Good Guys.

- Bro Jo




Dear Bro Jo,

Thank you so much for getting back to me.

I told my best friend what you said and he couldn't agree more.

I know the advice you gave me is right and I’ll be letting the guy know soon that there will be no more dates between us.

I hope I do meet someone who meets my high standards and if I get married at 20 then so be it.

Oh and I also appreciate your advice and your awesome blog!

Take care,

- Conflicted




Dear Conflicted,

Sounds to me like you already have a Good Guy in your life that you should be dating.

You just need to take him out of the Friend Zone.

- Bro Jo