Things to know

Regularly read by 50,000+ readers in over 140 countries around the world, "Dear Bro Jo" is published several times a month.

This is column is just one guy's opinion, and while he does his best to keep what he thinks, says and writes in-line with the Gospel of Jesus Christ, "Dear Bro Jo" is not an LDS Church website. (And Sister Jo thinks you should know that he's sometimes wrong, and often way too opinionated for his own good.)

Nothing here is meant to take the place of talking with parents, leaders, or Church authorities. Please, if you need serious help, talk to a trusted adult, leader, and / or professional counselor.

Please like our Facebook page, and check it often for Discussions, Notes, Events and just General Good Stuff!

Everything here is copyrighted. If you're going to quote any part of anything here, please get Bro Jo's written permission. You can reach him at

Friday, December 30, 2016

Commitment Issues: Part 3 of 3

[Dear Readers,

Sister Jo and I have been discussing what we see as a sad trend among young people in the Church:  Young Single Adults, men and women, giving up on wonderful relationships with wonderful people, sometimes not even giving these relationships much of a chance to start at all.

It happens for several different reasons.  

We know that modern media has clouded and confused the definitions of love and infatuation; that the prevalence of Social Media and Electronic Communication is crushing meaningful connections and real conversations; and that Satan is working very hard to lead our young people away from eternal relationships with one of his greatest tools:  fear.

Rather than take the risk and do the hard work that a Good Eternal Marriage requires (and reaping the blessings that come from all of that) excuses are made, worldly distractions and ambitions take over, and . . . well . . . like I said . . . opportunities are lost.  Or, rather, thrown away.

Enjoy this week's series!

- Bro Jo]

Dear Bro Jo,

I do it because it feels good to be in shape.

I know when the race is over I'll be proud of myself.

It's something I enjoy.

- NW

Dear NW,

So even though it hurts the end result is worth the pain and frustration and hard work?

- Bro Jo

Dear Bro Jo,

It is!

- NW

Dear NW,

You see where I'm going with this, right?

Look, I have the worst breakup stories . . . and lots of them.  I may have been dumped by more people than you've dated.

My junior year of high school I caught my girlfriend making out with her ex parked in a truck in front of my house.  I had gone to her house to give her flowers.  When she wasn't there I went home.

There was the girl that broke up with me on our 1 month anniversary and said she'd have dumped me sooner but she knew I'd never dated anyone for a month before and she wanted to set the record.  Which, by the way she said, she thought would stand for quite a while (and it did).

There was the girl who worked where I did. We saw each other at work and set a date for that night.  She even kissed me when we parted.  Not only did she no-call no-show, she quit work and I've never seen her since, despite going to her house and writing her letters.  (Actual ones, not the email kind.)

There was the girl who broke up with me . . . TWICE . . . in 12 HOURS!  At the end of a date she broke it off.  (This one actually broke the 1 month record.  I thought I'd marry her.)  I cried all the way home.  When I got home I called her.  She apologized, said she was just scared, and she wanted to keep our date plans that we had for the next morning.  I picked her up.  Good date.  Lot's of kissing.  At the end she said "no, I think I was right, this just isn't going to work out".

There are more, but you get my point.

Every relationship you get into ends, often horribly for at least one of you, except for your Eternal Companion.  And yeah, sure, not ever Temple Marriage works out . . .but it's worth the risk.

Sister Jo and I split up once.  Well, I say once, she insists that she tried to get rid of me several times.  We're passionate opinionated people, so there were more than a few "disagreements".

I can't promise you that you'll never get hurt.  In fact, I CAN promise you that you will.  Maybe a lot.  Heck, even Sister Jo and I have hurt each other from time to time.  Happens.

But, as I said, and as you've said with your training:  all of the pain and frustration and hard work is worth it.

It's okay to be afraid.

Just don’t give up, don't give in to the fear.

- Bro Jo

Dear Bro Jo,

Well thanks.

I can see where you're going now!

Alright, I won't give up and I'll try to be brave!

Thanks for sharing your insight. I really needed it!

- NW

Dear NW,

Good luck and God bless,

- Bro Jo

1 comment:

Michelle N Lurvey said...

I would be interested in hearing your thoughts on the Mid-Singles that can not commit to marriage or dating. It's frustrating being 33, RM,active and wants to get married while the eligible guys out there are just playing the field and some into their mid 40s and never married.