Dear Bro Jo . . . : Christmas Gifts

Things to know

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Monday, December 19, 2011

Christmas Gifts

Dear Bro Jo,

I have always done Christmas gifts for friends. Now that I am sixteen and can date, and it is Christmas, what are some good ideas of things to give girls?

I have known all of them for a while, and we are all good friends. Should that affect what i give? Should I do anything?

Sincerely,

Santa's Elf

Dear Elf,

I've made many, many gift-giving mistakes, with friends, girl friends, family . . . and now Sister Jo and the Jo Kids. (My Sister and I have birthdays two days apart, so she and I used to go to a music store together, pick out our own birthday gifts, swap at the register, and then swap back and say "happy birthday, I love you and thanks!) I'm so bad that it makes me nervous, so I always defer to Sister Jo for help.

She says this "when giving gifts to opposite sex friends, especially in your teens, the best thing to do is keep it simple and inexpensive".

Even if you're "in a relationship" (which I dont recommend) or trying to be in one (also not a good idea) you should still focus more on the spirit of giving than the specialness of the gift. Remember that often when peoplr are given gifts they feel obligated to reciprocate, even more so if the gift received is a big deal, and that's not what you want. At that point the gift can even be repelant.

Things Homemade are a great idea, and personable. Cookies, fudge, candy, picture frames, or a small momento that reflects a good time had together are all great ideas.

Happy Christmas!

- Bro Jo

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Bro Jo's "Dating Rules for Teens"

General
- Date in groups of 2 or more couples minimum, 3 or more couples is recommended
- Pick Up boys first, then girls; drop off girls first, then boys
- Be clean - literally and spiritually
- Plan must be pre-approved by the Parental Committee
- Borrow a Cell Phone from Parental Committee - for emergency use only
- Only date people your Parents have met (a pre-date meeting may be needed - a movie party at your house is a great way to have Mom and Dad meet all of this year's potential dates!)
- Don't flirt with another person's date - you can go out with them next time - focus on the person you're with
- Remember why you're dating: to get to know someone better, to discover what type of person you like to spend time with, and to practice this important social skill
- First Date is with Opposite Sex parent - prove that you're ready
- Keep the conversation going - spend more time asking questions than talking about yourself
- Focus on your companion - DO NOT TEXT YOUR FRIENDS WHILE OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE - it's rude and, well . . . lame
- No dating the same person twice in a row

Boys
- Home by 11:30pm
- Plan / Pick up / Pay
- Plan communicated to date - no surprises!
- Sisters deserve to go out with decent guys regularly, be one of those guys
- Chivalry isn't dead - show respect by opening doors
- It's scary to call, get over it (practice), it's your job to phone
- Be prepared Boy Scout: make sure the car is clean and has gas, be familiar with where you're going, have enough dough
- Keep dates simple and not too long
- No gifts (keep it casual)
- Meet the parents
- Minimum of one date per month

Girls
- Home by 11pm
- Know what's planned - and pre-communicate that plan to your parents
- Dress Modestly
- Teach your date that you deserve to be respected (make him open doors and insist that he use proper language)
- Don't call boys - make them call you (this is a respect tool)

Exceptions
- Formal Dates (like Prom or a Wedding) can extend the curfew 30 minutes
- Flowers may be an appropriate "gift" for formal occassions

Rules for Parents
- Set the Example (married parents should be dating weekly - if you can, occassionally make that a "Date to the Temple" - if you want your kids to go, they need to see you going - great for married-people dates - Bad Idea for first dates)
- Know your kids' friends, their dates and potential dates
- Communicate Expectations
- Help to Plan Ahead - especially in the beginning
- Discuss the Plan - offer council when asked, but don't take control
- Review the Rules
- Pray
- Don't Spy (if it's your date night too, go somewhere else - and get home before your teen)
- Wait Up - near the door, not in your bedroom
- Debrief - Discuss the date with your teen when they come home, before everyone goes to bed
- Be positive and encouraging
- Don't "arrange" dates for your kids with other parents - if the kids find out it'll be bad

REMEMBER PARENTS - You Water What You Want to Grow! (But too much water and the plant will drown.)

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Disclaimer

*This website is not affiliated with the Church of JESUS CHRIST of Latter-Day Saints, nor does it's author claim to write on behalf of the LDS Church.

for more information on The Church of JESUS CHRIST of Latter-Day Saints go to: http://www.mormon.org/

"Dear Bro Jo" is an entertainment column, and should not been used as a substitute for Professional Counseling, nor is it intended to replace conversations with one's Bishop or other Priesthood Authority.

All posts and content are the property of Dave Johnston (c) 2009-2013.

Dear Bro Jo . . .

Things to know

Monday, December 19, 2011

Christmas Gifts

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