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Monday, December 16, 2013

Her Parents are Hostile . . . What Can He Do?

Dear Bro Jo,

Your blog is one of the best for advice on dating and since I'm in a pickle right now I'll turn to your Fount of Knowledge seeking answers

First off I am 18 year old guy in High School senior.  I'm is 6`5", built like a tank, like football lineman big.

There is a girl "Mary" in my grade who is pretty cool that I would like to take on a date and the only thing impeding me is her parents.

I've asked said girl out twice and on each occasion she appeared excited/happy about the date only to inform me the next day each time that she couldn't come.

I asked her best friend why she couldn't after the 2nd time, and the friend said because of my size.   Mary and her family are small people, all under 5`4 which makes it so I kind of tower . . . so I can understand their worries . . . but still I've known Mary for 6 years so I hoped they'd trust me better because they do kind of know what I'm like.

I've met Mary's parents on a couple of occasions after dances, her birthday and a few football games.

On all those occasions there have been a lot of other people around I've shaken her dad's hands, talked to the parents and I've never done anything that should make her parents so scared of me or is my size reason enough.

So first of two questions:

1. How can I get this girl's parents to allow the date or should I just move on and forget about dating the girl?

2. Secondly what should I do if this problem comes up again cause most girls just aren't even very close to me in size or even in height?

In need of help,

- Over Sized Senior

Dear Sized,

You have no way of knowing whether or not what your friend said is correct, and even if it is, there's nothing you can really do about it.

It's not like you can change your size . . . nor should you want to.

Look, if you want to plan a Casual Group Date and ask her parent's permission to ask her out, you could try that, but nothing says they have to approve.

Plus, and understand that I say this as a guy who's been turned down way more times than anyone need remember, it may just be that she initially says yes, but then she changes her mind.

And we may never know why.

Maybe she's just being nice to begin with, but either doesn't really want to go, or doesn't want to go with you.

Maybe she got in trouble at home.

Maybe neither she nor her parents have a testimony of the whole Casual Group Dating thing.

Maybe her parents are afraid you're going to step on her!

(Hey, I can't think of any reason for them to be so ridiculous, so I'm hoping that's not the case.)

I can understand it eating at you.

Twenty five years later and I'm still haunted from time to time by some of the weird excuses and strange behavior that was part of my dating life.

Let it go.

Move on.

Too many other girls out there to date. 

Believe me, if you're a nice guy, she'll regret not going out with you.

And you may find out just how much she regrets it when you come home from the Mish.

- Bro Jo

Dear Bro Jo,

All right clarification:  Yes, I meant Casual Group Dates but I was lazy and didn't write the whole thing out but thanks for straightening me out cause my sister is the only one in my family with any dating experience and it’s nice to know that I'm interpreting things wrong here.

Thanks again Bro Jo.

- Over Sized

Dear Sized,

Anytime, bro.  Anytime.

- Bro Jo

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