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Friday, August 29, 2014

One Girl's Story - Part 6: The Break Up

Dear Bro Jo,

Thanks Bro Jo!

I AM worth the effort. (Funny side note. I've never been on this end of a breakup. I'm always the one who ends it. So I feel like I'm walking upside down. Not quite sure how to take it. Hmm. Karma. I have a sudden empathy for all my past boys. :))

I guess a week feels long when you're dating someone, but in reality it's a very short time.

I can wait two weeks.

And if nothing happens, his loss.

 - CG




Dear CG,

His loss indeed.

- Bro Jo




Dear Bro Jo,

I just wanted to send a quick note to let you know how it turned out. I waited two weeks and then sent him an email that basically said, "If you don't feel like dating, that's fine. But I have no idea what you're feeling. Come on, man. I'm worth a phone call."

(Not exactly what I said, but that's the idea.)

He emailed me back saying that he was in Hawaii and would call as soon as he got home, unless he was able to catch a flight to Japan.

He did catch a flight to Japan and was there for a week.

He sent me some pictures while he was gone, but he wasn't able to call.

But he did call me as soon as he was back in the states.

(While he was sitting in the Seattle airport actually.)

He told me that he had just needed to take a step back and think about it for a while.

His last girlfriend dumped him just before I met him and she burned the relationship pretty badly, so I can totally understand him being a bit hesitant (although he didn't say that was why he was nervous. I'm just guessing).

So he was distant for that week.

And then the other week and a half I didn't hear from him, he was traveling.

(His friend got him tickets last minute or something. It was very sudden.)

He still wants to get to know me, and still thinks I'm great, just needed some space.

I'm not resentful, so I still want to at least be friends.

He called me last night and we talked for about an hour, and it wasn't awkward at all.

I suppose that means we're still friends at least. I'm a little more cautious now though, because I think every friendship/relationship needs really good communication, and he didn't show that very well.

But it also needs patience and understanding, so I'm willing to be that.

I'm not going to chase him.

He can chase me.

Plus, I'm going back to school in less than two weeks, so I'm certainly not going to lack boys.

However, he's really amazing and pretty much blows everyone else I've dated out of the water.

Right now, I'm torn between totally falling for him again, and trying to hold back because I don't want to be super attached to someone who could drop me without warning or explanation.

Ugh.

Well. That's where it stands.

Merry Christmas!!! :)

Thanks! -CG

PS. I bought a copy of your Casual Group Dating Guide for my brother for Christmas. He turns 16 in 2 weeks. He loves it. :)




Dear CG,

Sounds like things are as well as can be expected.

At some point you may need to come out and tell him what you told me:

"hey, I think you're the most amazing guy I've ever met, but I can't wait around for you to feel the same way about me. If you want this to happen you'd better make a move before I'm no longer available".

When and if the Spirit inspires.

Merry Christmas!

- Bro Jo

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