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Friday, June 12, 2015

Cutting the Cord . . . at 26

Dear Bro Jo,

I don't like when my Mom makes decisions without my permission.

I'm almost 26 years old and sometimes she still treats me like a little girl and I don't like it at all.

My Mom is making me got some testing done because she is worried that I have something wrong with me.  Today I had to get blood drawn.  Then she wants me to get an ultrasound done on my tummy and I don't want to have it done because I'm afraid something will be found and my life will be different and I will have to have surgery and I don't want to be different than the way I already am.

Please give me some advice I how to deal with all of these.

Please give me any advice you have on how to handle all of things?

- Name Withheld




Dear NW,

At 26 your mom can't MAKE you do anything (unless, of course, for some reason you haven't disclosed here, she has custodial authority).

She only has power over you because you give her that power.

If you don't want to do something, tell her no.

In a nice way, of course.

Now, if she wants to suggest that you get some tests done, and you agree that's a good idea, get the tests done.

That's your decision, not hers.

AND it may be a very good one.

Refusing to get tests done because it wasn't your idea, or because you’re afraid of the results ... well, frankly that's just you acting like a big ol' baby.

If you want to be treated like an adult, you need to act like one.

Consider this: just exactly how does Anyone make an Adult do anything?

Unless there's the threat of violence, then what you're agreeing to do is your decision not hers.

Good luck on your tests,

- Bro Jo

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