I’ve been a big reader of the blog for a while now.
Just some background I'm a 15 year old guy, Active, and I'm Teachers Quorum President.
I need some help.
Or rather I need help helping a friend.
A good friend of mine in my Stake has paired off with another good friend of mine in the Stake. I know them both pretty well.
So here's the story.
About a month ago he (we'll call him Jeff) went out with her (we'll call her Marisa) on a single date to an amusement park. Some of my other friends were there and caught them holding hands while they were walking around.
So when I heard this I talked to him about it (and to my mom because she likes to keep up on what’s happening in the Stake and she’s friends with the girl).
After that he kinda convinced me that it was all innocent (I should’ve known better).
Then about a week ago they posted to Facebook that they were in a relationship. (I didn't see this post until yesterday).
When I saw it I messaged him about it. After a little bit of conversation he said this:
"Oh haha I gotcha, I was confused. Honestly (my name)? I have not jumped into this in any sense. We've prayed about it. Fasted about it. The prophets as a general rule don't encourage it but she and I have been thinking about this for... 4 months? We think we're smart enough to not make those mistakes that many young couples make. And we both after many months have gotten separate answers from God that this is right at this time. No offense (my name), but I'll take my counsel from God not Bro Jo. Sorry if that seems harsh but Marisa's been getting some flak from her parents and I'm just a little frustrated. I appreciate your concern"
(I already changed the names and withheld my name)
So he said he wasn’t going to take counsel from you because earlier in our conversation I sent him to two of your posts.
These ones in particular are: Good Guy's Dilemma and Why Can't We Be Friends?.
What really annoys me about this is she is a great girl and he’s a great guy but in the message he sent me he said
"We've prayed about it. Fasted about it. The prophets as a general rule don't encourage it but Marisa and I have been thinking about this for... 4 months? We think we're smart enough to not make those mistakes that many young couples make. And we both after many months have gotten"
HOW CAN GOD GIVE YOU AN ANSWER CONTRADICTORY TO HIS APOSTLES WORDS!!!!!
IT'S AN IMPOSSIBILITY!!!
That really annoys me to no end. I haven’t said that to him but i need some more advice.
I've already read up a ton on all the Church's things on dating I have the New Era April 2010 edition that is a special issue on dating and I've marked it up like my scriptures and I've gone through conference talks and teachings of the Prophets and consulted my parents ( they are both huge on dating rules).
As you can see I've done my HW I'm praying about it and pondering.
Would you tell me if I'm over reacting?
I just really care about them both. Any help on how to deal with this would be great. I've seen other youth in my older brothers' age groups have failed marriages (even one of Jeff's sisters) and people fall away from the Church all because they didn't date properly.
I really don't want this to happen to them.
- Help Please
Can a person receive Personal Revelation that's contrary to the Gospel and teachings of the Church?
And yet some members make claims like this all the time.
Because we have a tendency to look for ways to justify doing what we want even if we know it's wrong.
As you get older, as you serve a mission and in Church leadership, you likely will see this more and more.
The thing is that unless they ask our advice there's nothing you or I can say or do that will change their minds. They're already closed to the words of Heavenly Father, Jesus, The Spirit, Prophets and Apostles.
Just be a good pal, and don't say "I told you so" when they turn out to be wrong.
Unsolicited rebuking by us non-Prophets is usually just used as a further excuse for someone to stray.
- Bro Jo
Dear Bro Jo,
Darn really wanted to do something about it.
Well I guess all that's left to do is pray.
Prayer is powerful As is the love and friendship we show.
Set an example of what we're supposed to do, and don't come across as judgmental.
- Bro Jo