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Friday, June 18, 2010

Making Something Out of Nothing

Dear Bro Jo,

I love reading your blog every day and never thought I'd be the one wanting advice, but I really trust your opinion. So here it goes...

So there's this guy. I know, I know, you're thinking here we go again. Apparently he's liked me for 3 1/2 years. But he just barely told me, and now I've moved. But that's kind of okay by me because, well, there's a few things wrong with this. I actually like him too. A lot. But he's not a member. And of course I don't want to let my standards down at all. And I'm not 16.

My seminary teacher told me to just enjoy the long distance attention (because we're over 3,000 miles apart now), she said if he lived here she might feel differently but not to worry about it. Well apparently there's a really high chance that he's moving within an hour of me this summer. His mom knows he likes me and his dad said he can ride the train up to see me every weekend.

He knows my standards, he knows I'm not going to date until I'm 16, and he knows that I want to marry a returned missionary in the temple. I told him that I wouldn't be allowed to hang out just the two of us even if he did come up on a train every week. He said he understood. I said maybe we could go in a big group with a bunch of other people to the mall but even that I wasn't sure about. I also told him I wouldn't hold his hand or anything, just to make sure we were at the understanding. He said he understood, he's fine with that. But then there's the whole "boys and girls cant just be friends" thing.

I don't want it to turn into anything but I really like him and I don't want to lose him as a friend either. What should I say to him? How should I handle the whole situation?

p.s. my friends say I should ask him to read the Book of Mormon, that maybe he'll get baptized and maybe go on a mission and then I won't have anything to worry about. But I don't want to just shove a Book of Mormon in his face and say read this or I can't like you. And I'm sure I'm not going to be marrying him. Converting him, though, does seem semi likely but I don't really know.

Thanks,
confused


Dear Confused,

I hope you don't take this wrong, but really this seems like a non-issue.

You're free to like whomever you like, but you're not going to date this guy, he lives to far away to be any kind of boyfriend, you're nowhere near marrying age, not that he meets your criteria anyway . . .

Be nice. Corespond. Share your testimony if you feel so inspired.

But don't make this out to be anything more than it is, which, frankly, is "hey, I know this guy who lives really far away that is kind of good looking".

Big deal.

Spend your time and attention much closer to home.

- Bro Jo

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