Dear Bro Jo . . . : The Power of the Temple

Things to know

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Wednesday, May 5, 2010

The Power of the Temple

Dear Bro. Jo...

I've been back from my mission for about 5 months now and I am confused. I was realeased from my mission and I have only one question. I've heard the lock-your-heart talk and I agree. But it talks about elders who commit things during the mission.

I didn't do anything with this girl during the mission. She handed me a letter as I got on the bus to go to mission headquarters at the end of my two years. I read the letter and realized I really do have feelings for this girl. Does that make me a bad missionary. My brother said I confused a missionaries love with a Romantic Love. She's a convert to the church and has her son.

I babysat for many years and so I'm good at working with children and she said that my interaction with her child is what made her fall in love with me. Did I really Shortchange my mission? And Is it ok to go back to her? She has an amazing testimony of the gospel, really an amazing girl and I feel so torn between my feelings for her and the approval of my family.

Thanks

Elder confundido

Dear Confundido,

I'm sorry I'm just getting to this now - sometimes letters I should respond to right away get buried in the never ending cascade of romantic wishes of 14 year old girls . . .

:)

Anyway, it's a profound letter with some good questions . . . where do things sit with you now?

- Bro Jo

Dear Bro Jo,

Well things changed... dramatically. I went to the temple and prayed about it. And I didn't get an answer for a long time.

Then I decided I should start dating other people before I went back to be with her. I did and I found a girl who isn't perfect and isn't my soul-mate. However she did give me hope here.

Then I went to the temple when I wasn't quite so stricken for the girl from my mission, and there I received pretty much a spiritual beatdown. Basically I got the jist that if I went back I'd be putting my salvation in serious danger.

So I wrote her, she had no doubts concerning my revelation, she totally understood. We still keep in contact but only as friends. Thanks for responding...

- EC

Dear EC,

That's great!

Ah, the power of prayer and the temple - Good for you!

- Bro Jo

No comments:

Bro Jo's "Dating Rules for Teens"

General
- Date in groups of 2 or more couples minimum, 3 or more couples is recommended
- Pick Up boys first, then girls; drop off girls first, then boys
- Be clean - literally and spiritually
- Plan must be pre-approved by the Parental Committee
- Borrow a Cell Phone from Parental Committee - for emergency use only
- Only date people your Parents have met (a pre-date meeting may be needed - a movie party at your house is a great way to have Mom and Dad meet all of this year's potential dates!)
- Don't flirt with another person's date - you can go out with them next time - focus on the person you're with
- Remember why you're dating: to get to know someone better, to discover what type of person you like to spend time with, and to practice this important social skill
- First Date is with Opposite Sex parent - prove that you're ready
- Keep the conversation going - spend more time asking questions than talking about yourself
- Focus on your companion - DO NOT TEXT YOUR FRIENDS WHILE OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE - it's rude and, well . . . lame
- No dating the same person twice in a row

Boys
- Home by 11:30pm
- Plan / Pick up / Pay
- Plan communicated to date - no surprises!
- Sisters deserve to go out with decent guys regularly, be one of those guys
- Chivalry isn't dead - show respect by opening doors
- It's scary to call, get over it (practice), it's your job to phone
- Be prepared Boy Scout: make sure the car is clean and has gas, be familiar with where you're going, have enough dough
- Keep dates simple and not too long
- No gifts (keep it casual)
- Meet the parents
- Minimum of one date per month

Girls
- Home by 11pm
- Know what's planned - and pre-communicate that plan to your parents
- Dress Modestly
- Teach your date that you deserve to be respected (make him open doors and insist that he use proper language)
- Don't call boys - make them call you (this is a respect tool)

Exceptions
- Formal Dates (like Prom or a Wedding) can extend the curfew 30 minutes
- Flowers may be an appropriate "gift" for formal occassions

Rules for Parents
- Set the Example (married parents should be dating weekly - if you can, occassionally make that a "Date to the Temple" - if you want your kids to go, they need to see you going - great for married-people dates - Bad Idea for first dates)
- Know your kids' friends, their dates and potential dates
- Communicate Expectations
- Help to Plan Ahead - especially in the beginning
- Discuss the Plan - offer council when asked, but don't take control
- Review the Rules
- Pray
- Don't Spy (if it's your date night too, go somewhere else - and get home before your teen)
- Wait Up - near the door, not in your bedroom
- Debrief - Discuss the date with your teen when they come home, before everyone goes to bed
- Be positive and encouraging
- Don't "arrange" dates for your kids with other parents - if the kids find out it'll be bad

REMEMBER PARENTS - You Water What You Want to Grow! (But too much water and the plant will drown.)

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Disclaimer

*This website is not affiliated with the Church of JESUS CHRIST of Latter-Day Saints, nor does it's author claim to write on behalf of the LDS Church.

for more information on The Church of JESUS CHRIST of Latter-Day Saints go to: http://www.mormon.org/

"Dear Bro Jo" is an entertainment column, and should not been used as a substitute for Professional Counseling, nor is it intended to replace conversations with one's Bishop or other Priesthood Authority.

All posts and content are the property of Dave Johnston (c) 2009-2013.

Dear Bro Jo . . .

Things to know

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

The Power of the Temple

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