Activating a Neighbor

Dear Bro. Jo

My friend "Alex" is my backdoor neighbor who moved in a couple of years ago. He's very anti-social with anyone but me and couple of select friends. Me and my group of friends try and include him in activities and get him to do double dates with us and whatnot but he just shies away from it.

I honestly don't think he's ever held a conversation 1 on 1 with a girl and I know that very few people actually know more about him than his name. He's a cool guy and can get along with most people but just doesn't go near enough to meet them.

How can I get this guy included?

Also he says that if he knew how to ask a girl out properly he would but I’m not really an expert cause I barely turned 16 myself. I told him just to ask the girl if she wants go on a date, say what they’re going to do and who with and that’s it but I’m not sure if that’s quite correct.

Any help will be greatly appreciated,

- No Name



Dear Neighbor,

There's a difference between "anti-social" and "un-social"; your shy neighbor seems to be the latter.

As you get to know him better you may discover what's driving his shyness, and that may help you know what to do, but remember that not everyone is a "get-out-there-and-mingle" kind of a person; what you see as a flaw maybe something he's very comfortable with. Try accepting him for who he is.

Of course, when he says things like "not knowing how to ask a girl out" you could always direct him to "Bro Jo's Guide to Casual Group Dating" (and the Notes on the Facebook fan page)!

Another thing you can do is host a game night or movie party, inviting your neighbor, the kids he's comfortable with, and a couple new kids as well.

- Bro Jo