Things to know

Regularly read by 50,000+ readers in over 140 countries around the world, "Dear Bro Jo" is published every Monday, Wednesday and Friday (with occasional additional posts, too).

This is column is just one guy's opinion, and while he does his best to keep what he thinks, says and writes in-line with the Gospel of Jesus Christ, Bro Jo is not a spokesman or authority for the LDS Church. (And Sister Jo thinks you should know that he's sometimes wrong, and often way too opinionated for his own good.)

Nothing here is meant to take the place of talking with parents, leaders, or Church authorities. Please, if you need serious help, talk to a trusted adult, leader, and / or professional counselor.

Please like our Facebook page, and check it often for Discussions, Notes, Events and just General Good Stuff!

Everything here is copyrighted. If you're going to quote any part of anything here, please get Bro Jo's written permission. You can reach him at dearbrojo@gmail.com.

Monday, November 30, 2015

Getting Him to Ask You Out

Dear Bro Jo,

So my freshman year of high school I met this guy in my stake. He was a senior at the time and I was smitten.

Four years later and I’m a freshman at BYU and he's returned from serving a faithful mission.

He's been home for almost a year already and every day I find myself liking him even more.

We talk quite often on campus and each time I leave just so happy.

Honestly, I REALLY like him.

The only problem is that I've never dated anyone and I've only been on a few dates so I have no idea what I'm supposed to do now!

My friends keep telling me that I should ask him on a date but I don't want to embarrass myself. I don't think he would say no, I just don't seem to have the courage to do it. I'm pretty sure that he's as close to perfect as they come but I just don't know what to do!

Please help!

- Secretly Smitten




Dear Smitten,

Well . . . the first thing you need to do is breathe. 

One cannot act rationally if one is not calm.

Secondly, take him off the pedestal. He's not perfect, and I don't want you to be disappointed or discouraged with you get to know the real guy; infatuation and fantasy cloud our thinking (regardless of how fun they are).

Third, your friends are wrong. If you ask him out you're going to insult his manhood and possibly scare him away. (I know that sounds weird, even lame, but the truth is that lots of Good Guys want to be traditional and the girl doing the asking comes across as . . .well . . . desperate.)

Instead, what you need to do is get him to ask you out. Subtle, perhaps, but much more effective. 

Check out "Bro Jo's How a Girl Can Get a Guy to Ask Her on a Date"

You've got to jump from where you are now to letting him know you're romantically interested.

And, know this: if you don't act, you may always regret it.

Especially when you find out he's marrying a girl who made the move you were afraid to make.

Good luck, and keep us posted!

- Bro Jo

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Is having a trusted friend ask him if he's going to ask you out ok too?

Bro Jo said...

I sure think so.

- Bro Jo

Bro Jo said...

I sure think so.

- Bro Jo