Creating Something from Nothing

Dear Bro Jo,

I was recently put in the YW presidency (1st counselor over the Mia Maids 14-15 yr. olds). I'm still in the process of figuring out what my responsibilities are and getting to know the girls. I recently inquired about church dances and if I would be attending them (with my hubby) as a chaperon.

I was informed that our stake does not hold church dances. The former counselor told me that the girls really want them but the youth on the stake youth committee are really not interested in the idea. This bothers me. Is it just me or is this a real problem? If it is a problem how do I go about making a change. What are the proper channels I need to go through to get them started and could you give me some good "arguments" FOR church dances?

Thanks,

Dance-less in Utah


Dear Dance-less -

The first thing you need to do is gather a little more information and, given your calling, you need to do that through the "chain of authority".

Start with talking to the girls under your stewardship. See if they even want to go to dances. Given their age and the current lack of dances they may not see any reason to go. Share with them why you think Church Dances are a good idea. If they're on board, then you have a reason to move forward. If they're not on board, but the Spirit prompts you that these would be good experiences for your girls, you'll want to move forward anyway - but your approach may be different.

Involve your YW Presidency, share your feelings, and be prepared to volunteer to be the person who follows through with the Stake YM/YW Presidents, High Council and Stake Presidency.

You need to know if this is a Stake Policy, or just a trend.

To be honest, I find that typically when Stake Dances don't happen, or aren't very good, the reason is laziness. A Good Dance requires a good Plan, and that takes delegation, ownership and commitment.

I suspect as you begin to bring up this subject you'll find you're not as alone as you may now feel, and taking on something this big (both in Scope and as a Culture Battle) will be a lot easier with allies.

Not that a Stake Dance (or even a Multi-Stake Dance - which I think always works better) can't be done simply; they can, but even "simple" requires thought.

And, more directly to your question, here's:

Bro Jo's List of WHY CHURCH DANCES ARE A GOOD IDEA

1) They're Fun! - Or at least they can be, if well planned and advertised, and thus well attended.)
2) They're Social! - Youth are strengthened as they increase their associations with Similar Standards Peers.
3) They Teach! - How should a girl be treated? How do you converse with someone new? Why are dress, grooming and hygiene important? What's it like to ask (and to be asked by) someone of the opposite sex to do something - in this case "will you dance with me", which in a Very Short Time will be followed by "will you be my date" and then "will you marry me" (we old people often forget that the time from Mia Maid to Marriage can be as short as 4-6 years).
4) They Build! - Confidence, Relationships, Testimony.
5) They're an Alternative! - Don't our Youth still need wholesome activities on weekends?
6) They're a Missionary Opportunity! - Like every Church event, from Sacrament Meeting to Ward Basket-brawl to Scouts to the Christmas Devotional, Stake Dances are an opportunity for Member Missionaries to invite not-yet-member friends into our buildings, our hearts and our lives. If there aren't any dances, those opportunities are lost.

You may want to "volunteer" your girls to host a Stake, or Multi-Stake ("Just Do It!", the more the merrier) Dance at your Ward building (I'm pretty sure they could apply their work on such an event towards their Personal Progress) - take the initiative! Set the example!

Invite the Aaronic Priesthood in your Ward to help out - they need volunteer hours too, you know.

Good Luck and Have Fun!


- Bro Jo

PS - One step you may want to take towards winning over your girls is to call the surrounding Stakes, see what dances they have planned, and crash a couple (not really "crash" - talk to the people putting it on, tell them what you're trying to do, and come right out and ask if you and the girls can attend). This can be a great experience for them, a nice evening of dancing and service for you and your husband, and you'll all be able to ascertain the good and bad of what's out there.