Boy Crazy

Hey there,

Let me give you a little bit of my background before I Give you my situation.

I am 14, I am homeschooled, I take good care of myself, dress modestly and stylishly, I am a sober person, most people guess I'm 15 or 16 but Yet I can be quite extroverted, a party girl and wild with friends (You know, it's called being a teenager girl), I am into guys :)

OK, So Most all the girls I know always tell me how pretty I am over, and over again. I certainly don't think I am ugly. I always thought guys notice, flirt with and talk to the pretty girls. If I really where pretty though, I think guys would talk to me more. Most the guys I know are all about "Hot girls" So I know it's not them. Most of my friends (that are girls) get the guys easy but I don't particularly. Guys talk to me and stuff but it's pretty rare. It's rather hurtful to my self esteem and what not. However, I don't want to automatically assume that guys don't think twice of me if I can't read their minds. You are a guy so you can tell me if I'm wrong. Guys can be experts at hiding their emotions I've noticed. Do you have any advice for a girl seeking out the attention of boys, or just friendship?

Thanks,

Boy crazy


Dear Crazy,

First of all, whether or not you're pretty (or, more importantly, have Heavenly Value, Virtue and Worth) has nothing to do with anyone else (including boys) and the attention you do or don't get. I'm sure I've written a hundred times that often the "best" girls (which can include the "prettiest") don't get much outward attention from guys, especially at your age. Look around your ward: there are women that are empirically "model pretty", women who you can tell were once "stunning" but who's looks have perhaps softened or changed with age and time, and women who (let's be honest) you can't ever imagine being pretty enough to have attracted a man . . . but they're all married, usually to someone who's worthy and loves them eternally. Frankly what you call "pretty" isn't all that important.

Now, each of us can do better with what we've got; and we should. For girls I've written Bro Jo's "HOW a GIRL CAN GET a BOY'S ATTENTION"; perhaps you'll want to check it out to see if there's not somewhere you can make some improvements.

It seems to me that you could certainly stand to be a little more grateful (and humble) about the gifts which the lord has blessed you. That's one thing that both Guys and Gals seem to find attractive.

Guys aren't experts at anything; they're just different than girls. (Keep that in mind.)

As far as my advice for girls your age that are "boy crazy" and desperate for attention: knock it off; get over it, move on.

Look, there's nothing wrong with being attracted to the opposite sex, not at all. There's not even anything wrong with acting upon those feelings . . . a little; talk, flirt, have boy-girl video parties and get togethers.

But obsess WAY less.

- Bro Jo