Dear Bro Jo,
Hello again!
Sorry to bother with many questions all the time, but I think I really need your help on this one.
So I have this friend that is really interested in the church. She went to TFY (EFY but shorter) and I know she felt the spirit. She's really interested in the church but the problem is with her parents. She's not really one to share what she's doing with her parents, so, though she's came to dinner with the missionaries and come to church with me, she told her dad she was just going over my place. She's convinced herself that she'll investigate the church when she's 18 and an adult.
I've decided that I want to talk to her parents about the church. I fasted the other day and have prayed a lot about it, and I know that it's the right thing to do. I was thinking I would just ask them if they knew what church I go to since I take their daughter to the dances when ever they're on. I was going to explain a little about what we believe in including how the family plays an important role in the church just the basic things of the church.
I've been setting myself up to do this for a while, waiting to go over my friends house, than something happened. I found out my friends parents are getting separated. Part of me feels like I shouldn't Add more drama into their lives and bother them with what I'm saying. I also feel like if I talk about the family and everything or even the gospel, that they'll think I'm just picking on them or even judging them.
So I think what I'm asking here is, not exactly if I SHOULD talk to her parents (specifically her dad, who is home most) but how I should go about it. I'm just really confused about it. And I really want my friend and her family to feel of the gospel.
thank you for your time!
- Thinking of a Friend
Dear Thinking,
Everyone can benefit from the Gospel of Jesus Christ and learning more about his teachings.
(Even those that are already members of his Church, right?)
As "member missionaries" we often fret about the timing, worried that even if we say the right thing if we say it at the wrong time we're more likely to offend someone than encourage them.
Which is really weird, if you think about it. Why do we joke and tease and taunt those we love, why are we quick to tell them about movies and new music and sales, but are hesitant when it comes to sharing something so uplifting?
Perhaps because it's so personal for us. Perhaps because we fear making a mistake. Maybe we're afraid we don't know doctrine well enough.
Fear is the opposite of faith. If we trust in the Lord and heed the promptings of the Spirit we have no need to fear. That doesn't mean we won't feel fear, it means that despite our fears we can go forward knowing that we'll be blessed for doing the right thing.
So, if you feel so moved by the Spirit, talk to your friend's family. Don't be preachy or act like you're better or smarter than they are; be humble. Don't make it a big production, just offer and mention some things when the moment feels right; be prayerful. Don't put yourself in a situation where you're a young woman alone with a soon-to-be-single-again man; be smart.
I hope this is a positive experience for you, but if it's not I think you'll be blessed just because your heart's in the right place.
Let us know how it goes,
- Bro Jo
Dear Bro Jo,
Thank you!
They are trying to working it out and are going to see a counselor. I'll definitely try and feel the spirit and follow it's promptings. and the alone thing won’t be a problem, I'm always with my friend at her house :P I'll let you know how it goes for sure!
- Thinking
Dear Bro Jo,
Just a quick recap. So I was thinking about what you said. I all of a sudden felt really uneasy. I read and pondered the scriptures a bit than sort of had a thought pop into my head, that maybe my friend should do it. So I prayed about it. After feeling so uneasy, I than felt really sure and I realized, although I had a confirmation that someone should talk to her parents didn't really have a confirmation of me doing it. Tells you something about answers to prayers :P
So I talked to my friend about doing it. She's reluctant but maybe after a while the idea will grow on her.
That's about it for now.
- Thinking
Dear Thinking,
The Spirit is a powerful tool.
- Bro Jo
Dating, Relationship and Other Advice for LDS Teens, Young Single Adults, and anyone else who could use a little help (since 2009) from someone who cares enough to give it to you straight.
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This is column is just one guy's opinion, and while he does his best to keep what he thinks, says and writes in-line with the Gospel of Jesus Christ, "Dear Bro Jo" is not an LDS Church website. (And Sister Jo thinks you should know that he's sometimes wrong, and often way too opinionated for his own good.)
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This is column is just one guy's opinion, and while he does his best to keep what he thinks, says and writes in-line with the Gospel of Jesus Christ, "Dear Bro Jo" is not an LDS Church website. (And Sister Jo thinks you should know that he's sometimes wrong, and often way too opinionated for his own good.)
Nothing here is meant to take the place of talking with parents, leaders, or Church authorities. Please, if you need serious help, talk to a trusted adult, leader, and / or professional counselor.
Please like our Facebook page, and check it often for Discussions, Notes, Events and just General Good Stuff!
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